I’ve been around computers since I was about 6 years old. My very first computer was a Radio Shack Color Computer. Man, that thing was sweet! The actual computer itself was housed in the keyboard (which was freaking huge) so it weighed about 15 pounds, and it loaded data from a cassette tape. There was no such thing as a mouse back then. Everything was done by typing (similar to what most of you know as a DOS prompt now, kinda.) “Color Computer” was quite the misnomer, however. It was greyish silver and black, as far as the hardware goes. And there was no dedicated monitor for it. Instead, I used my television (an 11” black and white tv set) to see what I was doing. It was rather primitive, but it gave me endless hours of fun.
A few years after that, I was introduced to a slightly better world of computers with an 8088 with a monochrome (amber and black ftw!) monitor and a 2400 baud external modem. This was my entry into the world of social computing with BBSing. This was well over 20 years ago. This was before MySpace, Twitter, FaceBook, and all the social media that 99% of you know of. In fact, most of you have never heard of BBSing. But for those of us who remember it, it was a great time in social BBSing. (For some of us, it still is!) There was a certain unspoken code of netiquette that was followed by most people back then. It seems like people these days just don’t seem to “get it” as it relates to socializing in cyberspace. I like to think that most of my friends are intelligent, creative, bright, funny, wonderful, charming people who are able to conduct themselves in a way that shows them in the best possible light. Unfortunately, I log on to Facebook, and I am proven wrong. I’m just going to give you all a few basic little pointers, and I’m not going to name any names or point any fingers here. We’re all guilty of breaking one or two of these rules from time to time, and that’s fine. But I think some of us need to be reminded of some things. So here goes. 
1. What you post on the internet, regardless of your security settings or how safe you think you are, is not 100% safe from being seen by the rest of the world. If you don’t want everyone in the world to see it, don’t post it. This includes naked photos, nearly naked photos, commentary about how drunk you were last night, commentary about who you hooked up with last night, complaints about how much you hate your boss, discussions about your bowel habits, photos of your new panties, pictures of your random drug paraphernalia, or other such idiocy. If you do post it, I do not want to see you bitching and moaning about someone forwarding the pictures to other people and embarrassing you. You’re an embarrassment to yourself. You’re the idiot who posted it on the internet in the first place.
2. You don’t need to post every single thought you have in a given day as a status update. Really. You’re not a philosopher. You’re not a poet. You’re just an average person with an overinflated sense of self-importance, who happens to have an internet connection and a Facebook account. The rest of the world really doesn’t think you’re all that clever. Your puns aren’t that funny. Your jokes aren’t really cute. Once in a while, we might chuckle slightly for a half of a second at something you’ve written. But the other 47 updates you post in a day are just annoying. Seriously.
3. I don’t give a damn what song you’re listening to. I sure as hell don’t want to watch 36 music videos that you’re watching. In fact, it usually makes me wonder why I consider you my friend. I mean, really, Lady Gaga? Seriously? Backstreet Boys? Are you kidding me? Do you even HAVE a soul? I only ask because I really don’t know after seeing the collective vomit pile of music you listen to. It’s really disturbing.
4. If you spend all your free time playing Facebook games and are devastated when something terrible happens to your game, you fail. At everything. It’s a freaking GAME. Get over it. I could understand it if you were 6. Maybe even 15. But you’re a freaking adult. Grow up and jump into the real world. By the same token, I don’t give a damn about your farm, cafe, restaurant, mafia, brothel, chicken coup, fish pond, or any other lame-assed virtual thing you’re trying to build. Stop sending me requests. I have a special little script installed to block the crap from my news feed. All of you who post status updates about Farmville and Hookertown and Mafialand get blocked from my news feed immediately. Yes, I am that annoyed by it. If the most interesting thing you can find to talk about is a Facebook game, then I’m probably not missing much by ignoring your posts.
5. Chain letters were lame back in the days of snail mail. They’re lame in email messages. They’re lame in text messages. Guess where else they’re lame? In status updates!! You posting some grammatically-incorrect, horribly misspelled statement in your status is really not going to raise awareness, money, sensitivity, or concern for any issue or cause. If you think it will, well, then I’ll start a chain mail status update and collection for your particular kind of “special.”
6. You don’t need to talk like a piece of trash to be thought of as cool, or popular, or awesome. I think that’s pretty self-explanatory, so I’ll leave it alone.
Hopefully some of you will take some of these things to heart and use them. Note that this is just a short list, and it’s just a starting point. Feel free to comment and add some more suggestions for your fellow internet users. 
As always… <3
